In Better Hands


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This is clearly the case with children with physical or mental disabilities or emotional disorders.


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But it can be a bit harder to navigate when a child is gifted. Few among us want to be accused of raising a special snowflake, but sometimes, those snowflakes reveal themselves as a little special.

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Should we leave these children alone with their gifts and talents, allowing them to pursue their interests on their own terms? Or should we intervene?

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Rod Wood: Detroit Lions in better hands with Martha Ford

A high-performing child needs this just as much as her peers, he explained, and research shows that she will suffer if she doesn't receive it. Why the old way of parenting no longer works. Islas recommends a little-by-little approach when challenging gifted children and says children do best when there is someone to coach them through new ideas and concepts. For every child, there's a sweet spot or an optimal growth zone, depending on their knowledge and abilities.

Push them too much or too little, and they won't learn.

In an ideal world, school educators are able to meet the needs of all children, no matter how they perform in class. However, budget cuts and other reforms have chipped away at special education programs for gifted children in some parts of the country, making them far from a sure thing. But, Islas said, these trends are beginning to reverse.

After a long era of public education in which teachers were encouraged to emphasize proficiency and standardized knowledge, there is now a movement toward more personalized learning strategies. What happens when you give your kids a 'Yes Day'.

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Educators "are recognizing that people come to school at different levels, and we have an obligation to help them all achieve at their optimal levels. This means using different strategies that are sometimes above the norm for a student's age group," Islas said. If a school isn't able to meet a child's educational needs, Islas said, parents should seek out alternative forms of enrichment.

Maybe this happens through an app, a local club or weekly chats about geometry or poetry at the kitchen table. The goal is to keep them engaged.

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Ann Hulbert, author of " Off the Charts: The Hidden Lives and Lessons of American Prodigies ," advises parents to be aware of the difference between supporting gifted children to create their own story and writing their story for them. Parents can avoid the shift into manager mode by focusing on what brings their children joy and a sense of satisfaction, rather than acclaim.

The dominant lesson that emerges from the collection of life stories unfolded in Hulbert's book is a familiar one: life, and the people living it, can surprise us. Exceptionality might fade to proficiency; motivation might curdle into frustration or boredom; interests might lose their appeal.

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Maternal gatekeeping: Why moms don't let dads help. Perhaps more important, circumstances change and are largely out of our control. Success requires a lot of hard work and talent, yes, but it also requires a lot of luck.


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Parents of all kids, though perhaps especially those labeled as "promising," shouldn't ignore the fact that tomorrow will not necessarily look or feel like today. Striking the right note of enthusiastic support with a gifted child requires parents to follow the children's lead.

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Hulbert said stories about parents of autistic savants are helpful in understanding how this works. William Clay Ford had a reputation as Detroit Lions owner for trusting the wrong people much longer than their results warranted.

Wood, speaking at a fan event Monday in Grand Rapids, said the biggest reason to believe the Lions are finally on the right track after five decades of mediocrity is "the people at the top running the organization, myself included, setting the right tone, starting with ownership. And then after we decided to make a change with the head coach, we kind of went back and looked for the same kind of opportunity to add a coach who doesn't expect anything less than competing for the Super Bowl every year.

The Lions experienced some prosperity in the s, reaching the postseason six times and winning their only playoff game of the Ford era on Jan. But Ford hired Matt Millen as general manager in and let Millen run the franchise for eight ill-fated years. The Lions went an NFL-worst during Millen's tenure, and have made the playoffs just three times in the decade since he was fired.

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